Helping Children Cope with Separation/Divorce

Not everyone is blessed with a complete and happy family. It is quite acceptable to see broken families, children dealing with step mothers or step fathers, or children dealing with a single parent. Separation or divorce is acquired by most couples who cannot deal with their relationship anymore, or simply cannot work things out between them any longer. When this happens, their children are the ones who suffer the most. They now encounter a state of depression, wherein they tend to think about what they had before as a family, their connection, their close relationship between each other. This often links to even more decrease in their happiness, causing further psychological problems if not dealt with as soon as possible.

When dealing with separation/divorce, the couple themselves need to analyze and think of what is going to happen with regards to their shared finances, their house, and most especially the custody of their children. It is critical for each parent to know what their children are feeling, since this is a state of anxiety not just for them, but also for their kids. Of course, feelings of depression cannot be avoided by everyone, since their lives are about to change, hopefully for the better. But separated is a hard stage to manage because all family members involved have feelings of anxiety and sometimes depression, which could make things even worse to handle or accept.

Children with separated/divorced parents can truly be unpredictable. Some may show optimism by showing that they are independent and mature with regards to their parent's condition. This can be seen when children are of proper age, and can understand this kind of predicament. Others may react differently, showing no emotions whatsoever. This situation must be guarded accordingly, since the child may suffer from anxiety or depression but is not capable of letting it all out yet. In this case, it is wise to let the child into family counseling, a good way to communicate and interact with their thoughts and emotions. In this way, they may be able to express what they are truly feeling about the situation, and the respective counselor can assess the child's behavior and can give an appropriate evaluation of the child. This can really help in finding peace within the child himself, and can also make him easier to accept the unfavorable situation. Younger children require at least one from the couple to be with them during these kinds of situations since they cannot take care of themselves without having at least a parent nearby. It would be recommended to try and talk to the child in a nice and loving manner, simplifying the events that are taking place. The child needs to know why his parents are not together anymore, so that he may not fall into a state of depression.  Giving extra time and effort to the children can be of great help to their emotional healing.  Children should be given the attention they need. Being able to communicate well with your children, asking them about their everyday lives, and just to be a part of their life can have a huge impact on their upbringing. Parents should continue to see, talk, and love their children even when the only option to take is separated.